today is January 5,not written for a while ,Xmas has come and gone thank goodness it was very hard without my dad being there.i miss him the closest Ive ever been with my dad was the when he was ill ,it was really special cause i could show him how much i cared .all my kids went back to school after the holidays it was bliss,my 13 year old son is going through puberty ,i will talk to him as much as i can about things and there are some things i wont talk about . So have been a single parent for 12 months ,if I'm honest I'm loving it ,i can teach my kids what i want and i am free to make my own decisions ,even if sometimes there the wrong ones at least i can make my own choices.